Campus Sex Files (4): Dear Professor Oluchi, I am having an affair with a lecturer – how do I end it?

Posted by admin Campus Sex Files, Headlines Wednesday, April 13th, 2016

Dear Professor Oluchi,

I am having an affair with my former lecturer and I know he is married, but he pretends as if he is separated from his wife. It started when I took his course almost a year ago. He slept with most of my friends and passed us even though some of my friends stopped attending his lectures after they slept with him. Before the course ended, he told me he would like to continue our sexual relationship. I agreed and we have been having sex regularly, on a few occasions in his office in the late evenings. Most times, we will go to a nearby hotel, never to his home. I want out as I know the relationship is going nowhere. How do I end it in a polite but firm way?

Bose – By email

Dear Bose:

It was wrong in the first place to have engaged in sexual relationship with him. Even if that meant not passing his course, so be it. You have dignity as a person and as woman and you can’t sacrifice that for any man, even a lecturer. Since the deed has been done, you should cut the ties to him immediately. If he is married, as you stated, it means that you are potentially wrecking another woman’s home and you wouldn’t want another woman to do the same to you. Call and tell him in no uncertain terms that you are no longer interested in the relationship. If female students across the country stand together, they can defeat those lecturers who have turned the campus into a sex camp. A lecturer cannot fail all the girls in his class if they all refuse to give into his sexual demands. It’s time to cut all ties to him and move on with your life.

Sincerely,
Professor Oluchi

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Oluchi, a professor in one of the universities in Nigeria, dedicates this column to young female students across the country who may be subjected to sexual harassment by their lecturers, cultists, administrators or fellow students. Having experienced sexual harassment herself as a university student without institutional or professional support, she feels strongly in leveraging her counselling background to provide as much support to the often helpless victims.

Send your emails to [email protected] with the words “Dear Professor Oluchi” – coming before your title in the subject area. As the editor receives hundreds of emails each day, please be sure to follow this simple instruction for the quickest response.

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